I didn't go to church today,
I trust the Lord to understand.
The surf was swirling blue and white,
The children swirling on the sand.
He knows, He knows how brief my stay,
How brief this spell of summer weather,
He knows when I am said and done
We'll have plenty of time together.
Kind of sums up my dilemma about church in general.
I want to go to a church, because I like churches and I want a community, and I'd like to learn more about a spiritual life.
But me and God (The Divine, The Universe), we don't need a church to talk. I don't think God's there any more than S/He's anywhere else (in the forest, in the grocery store, in my heart).
I feel closest to God when I'm out on a beautiful day, when I'm in a deep forest, when I'm home and the lights are down and I'm sitting quietly with a book and tea. I rarely feel close to God at church (and I've been to lots of different churches... maybe that's my problem?), unless it's when the choir sings, and especially Christmas songs. I always tear up and can't sing along because I start crying.
I figure whatever Divine Spirit there is, is present anywhere. Some people find it in church. Some elsewhere. I wish I could find a church that feels like a spiritual home. Or a synagogue. Or a temple. I don't really care where, I'm not attached to a particular spiritual path (again, maybe that's my problem). But I'd like to find a place where I felt just as close to God, or maybe just a place where I feel like the channel is open, as I do out in nature, or in my quiet house, or singing with joy in my car.
And since our stay is so brief, why not find ways to be with the Universe, with Divine presence, wherever you are?
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2 comments:
Thanks for that, you made me smile. Again.
I don't consider myself religious, but definitely spiritual. I started talking to It/God more than ever when I was an exchange student in Japan. I was so desperately lonely and hurting and just plain unhappy that it was all I had, and it helped.
Despite being someone who DOES find God in a church on a regular bases, I agree that that isn't the only place you'll find whatever you want to call that higher power. Singing in your car is definitely a good place! A friend told me once that singing is like praying twice. I don't think God cares what you sing, or if you can sing (luckily for me!), or where you look for Him, so long as you do.
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